Remembering Sunday.

i need you now, and I'll hold on to you and i wont let you go.

Sunday, March 28, 2010

alright I'm not going to post another "Oh i regret" or "Oh I'm sorry" and other crap. I'm just going to blurt out all the English vocabulary that I'm about to type and It's it will be kinda harsh but by god i don't give a damn about it.

I don't really understand you. You said that you were with him and his friends and it turns out it was just the four of you. In my point of view, it looks like as if it was a perfectly planned double date. Ah, two sweet couple taking a stroll at the nearest outskirts of town. Just because you found out there were girls with us and you suddenly started giving faces. I did mention a few names of the girls but did you listened? On that spot i was just utterly speechless all could do was walk away and while doing that i saw that friend of yours at the corner, i was about to go berserk and give him an old school trashing i swear to god, but thanks to someone i was able to cool down for just a second and just walk away. I'm still not satisfied, not satisfied because of why i blamed myself, being sober all the time or even scolded myself because of you. Jealousy was what i was having all this while and i can't even find an answer to that. Maybe because I'm scared of something, something that i can't even imagine it happening. You seem happy contacting him while we slacking, and to think i was not feeling annoyed. If i was there to accompany you that day, you would have never met him. All this while i treated this as if this was a competition and it seemed I've scored the lowest between me and him. my sincere congratulations to him, I'm just not good at this game. Whoever he is, whoever he may be one thing is for sure he's good. But for sure, I'll break his face if i ever see him again. I have recently been having nightmares that you were with him and all seems like a blur, it was hard to digest everything in the morning. I don't really know how to even react right now, I'm out of words to even know what to text you now. I asked myself a few hours ago of the point of me staying in this shit, cause i feel like as if i was discarded for the second time. I think it's only about half of what to say and i don't really bother typing any further. Sleep is what i need now and i think my brain should be back online once i wake up later. I don't even bother to touch my phone now and i think i should be able to live better without it. It's been sometime that i posted a long one. I will be on hiatus this few days due to some reason. Chows~

Labels: Baby, what really happened?